Help me change my behaviour

When men choose to seek help to end their violence, they go on to have healthier and happier relationships. For men who are fathers or caregivers, ending use of violence also extends to enabling healthier relationships with their children.

How Mensline can help you

Mensline works with men using violence to:

• Acknowledge the courage it takes to ask for help to put an end to controlling and abusive behaviour.
• Understand that individuals are responsible for their own behaviour and should be held accountable for their choice to use violence and abuse.
• Support men to change their behaviour through information and referrals, including to Men’s Behaviour Intervention Programs.

Call 1800 600 636

Steps to Behavioural Change

1) Deciding to change When a person decides to change their behaviours so they are safe to be around, they must be prepared to do some very hard work and reflection on the ways they have caused harm.

They must be ready to stop minimising, denying, and blaming their partner and life circumstances for using abuse. A person using abuse must take responsibility for their use of violence. If they need support for the impacts of childhood trauma, drug or alcohol use, professional help is available. Find services on the Other Services page.

2) Learn strategies to cool down before becoming abusive, such as removing themselves from triggering situations, speaking to a friend, or seeking out a counsellor or psychologist. Find out more on the MensLine Australia website.

3) Not relying on their partner to make them a better man. They must be prepared to do this work on their own or with professional support from Mensline or another service. Abuse has long-lasting impacts and men should avoid compounding trauma by involving their partner in their recovery.

4) They don’t have to do it alone. There is information, professional supports and resources to help. Men’s Behaviour Intervention Programs are also an option for men who are committed to making changes to their behaviours and having healthier relationships.

Call 1800 600 636

Men’s Behaviour Intervention Programs

Men’s programs are voluntary programs to explore and challenge beliefs and attitudes that are the main drivers of violence against women and children.

Over 8-16 weeks, the program brings together men who are ready to acknowledge their use of violence and get support to change. Groups encourage reflection and learning from each other under the guidance of professional facilitators.

Groups may cover topics such as gender inequality, power and control, and the impacts of violence on women and children.

If you are ready to change your behaviours, call Mensline on 1800 600 636 to find a Behaviour Intervention Program near you.

Call 1800 600 636